spoof on morality

you just cant talk about anything you want to

Published on December 6, 2004 By coolcroc In Humor

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tounge-in-cheek

a tribute to human stupidity.

since the churches influence people to be decent .. people are
reluctant to talk about bodily functions like sex or bathroom
activities. now the church has decided it is indecent to eat
or talk about food.

so people go into restuarants only for take-out now and go back
to eat furitively in their cars. it is now shocking to ask anyone
what they had for dinner and inviting people for dinner is rated
as a minor orgy. grocery stores are no longer allowed to advertise.
anybody heavy is regarded as a sinner first class. kitchens in
homes are sealed off from children or visitors. people going into
grocery stores pull thier collars up and thier hats down or wear
ski-masks. women are embarrassed to go there at all. men now have
to do all the grocery shopping because of the double-standard men
get away with..or they just dont give a hoot.

starving countries or homeless people without money for food are
achieving minor saint status. doctors are now suggesting that we
get diseases from foods so as to make it even more undesirable to
eat. people now buy nourishment in pill form and those that do
go around feeling superior to everybody else. a teenager caught
eating might be grounded for two weeks. movies that contain
dinner parties have been banned. fast-food workers have the
status of pimps. not going to the bathroom for several days
makes the person feel very holy. only married people are allowed
to eat together. public toilets are being removed or referred to
as the clinic. are you getting any has taken on a new meaning.
only skinny people are believed to go to heaven. pets are now
looked upon as little addicts. grocery stores and restuarants
are closing by the thousands and a black market has sprung up.
anyone seen eating an apple on the streets is arrested as a
flasher. the mere mention of a hamburger causes decent women
to blush furiously. pregnant women now wear masks. you have to
be at least 18 to buy food. everyone knows other people eat
but it is indecent to talk about it. everyone pretends that
they dont eat. eating a variety of foods is considered
promiscuous. they are thinking of making it unlawful to eat
tho no laws have been passed on that yet. they are afraid
to talk about it in the legislature. builders have started
building fancy outhouses seperate from the homes..sometimes
with kitchen attached to that part too. married women have
started saying they havent had sex in years. men are very
grouchy and the crime rate has risen tremendously. more men
are sneaking off to little fast-food brothels or driving
down the shady part of town looking for street vendors.
the church is trying to justify masks that cover the mouth
and nose as they are ORFICES and orfices should not be seen
in public. a lot of men are migrating to switzerland and
amsterdam. the bible is being revised to remove the part
about jesus feeding the multitudes. farms have barbed wire
around them and may soon be subsidized not to grow anything.
people are now ashamed to be members of the human race..
and they dam well SHOULD BE.

Comments

TheFazz

on Dec 06, 2004

Interesting...

island_gurl12

on Dec 06, 2004

I smiled at some of these

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